Favorite In Game Quotes

Borderlands 2 could be perhaps the funniest game in existence. Some of the quotes are gut-busting hilarious.
My favorite: (makes me laugh even after hearing it a thousand times is) “Dibs on their scalps”

another fave is: “POP goes the Bandit” Tiny Tina

Which in game quotes busts your gut?

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‘WHO THE HELL IS MUSHY SNUGGLEBITES?!’

So much so it’s my text message tone. Always makes me laugh! :smiley:

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OH YEAH!! That one is AWESOME!!!

Can’t decide between those two :

  • “COME TO ME, WRATH SPONGE !!!”
  • “I am eternal / Death will never capture me / My skills exceed his.”
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“Piss on me eyes … Is that the Hodunk emblem I see?”

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I’m afraid that my answer will be more of a top ten, but with all ten in the first spot. Here we go:

“I’ve been shot in the face before!” - Marauder
“I’m shooting at the right people, yeah?” - Marauder
“Present? For me?” - Goliath on incoming grenade
“I’m back, Bitches!” - Maya after recovering from FFYL
“Bienvenido a la fiesta!” - Salvador
“Who took off his helmet?” - Nomad on popping Goliath’s helmet
“Cover me in it!” - Psycho being slagged
“It’s staring at me!” - Tiny Tina in TTAoDK during the “crumpet mission”
“I hated that guy too!” - Brick
“I’M GONNA SHOVE THAT THING UP YOUR ASS!” - Raging Goliath on Axton tossing his turret
EDIT: 'Bit of a mash up there, I’m afraid! Here’s how it really is:
“I’M GONNA CRAM THAT THING DOWN YOUR THROAT!” - Raging goliath on Axton tossing his turret
“THAT’S JUST ONE MORE THING I CAN SHOVE UP YOUR ASS!” - Raging Goliath on Salvador activating Gunzerk

Honorable mentions:
Pretty much everything Jimbo Hodunk says
“Back on the shield! Now!” - Nomad to midget

Although there are some fantastic dialogue coming from characters like Jack, Tannis, Moxxi and the rest of them, the dialogue you get from random npc’s is what really cracks me up. So much love and effort was put into that! I could go on and on about the quotes you get from marauders, psychos and goliaths, but you know what I’m talking about. It’s just great!

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Probably Kreig, anytime he speaks.

He’s not coming back. Crap. Oh God I’m gonna miss Kreig. Even a sketchy person can write a loveable character.

Goliath dying to fire x2:
If you can’t take heat, make kitchen
Now ladies say I hottie

Also, psychos quoting Shakespeare.

Goliath - “Let’s make face gravy”

I’m pretty sure Mr. Torque reigns supreme on the quotes for me.

“Holy shxt-socks that was impressive!”
and…
“How the fxck am I supposed to know that illegal off-world death-matches are illegal!?”

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Handsome Jack - " Hey this is Wolin … Let’s all go kill Handsome Jack and go out for milkshakes"

Casting Resurrection (just now finding this thread) with…

“Hey look - bad guys!” - Lilith

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“2 cannibal midgets in a fat guy’s rib-cage” - Claptrap

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I love the Poetic License mission. The whole thing just feels so absurd, creepy, and romantic all at the same time. There should be a word for that.

Favorite bits:
Scooter : Whoo, boy! That bandit hung hisself from his own tombstone! It’s dark, it’s depressin’, I don’t understand what I’m talkin’ about. It’s PERFECT! Puttin’ that in the poem!

And…

Scooter’s poem:
“Herein is Scooter’s poem for you Daisy. Here we go.
Daisy, I like you a whole lot
More than that bandit liked spoonin’ that ro-bot.
You are a diamond in the rough
Or a flower surrounded by shrapnel and stuff.
I will hang myself from my own tombstone
if within you, I cannot put my bone.”

One of my favorite poems. I might argue that Scooter is the last (only?) true romantic on Pandora. :wink:
(Edited to reflect an appropriate quantity of snark.)

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“But I don’t WANT YOU TO DIE CAUSE YOU’RE COOL, OH CRAP I’M NOT WHISPERING ANYMORE MY BAD.”

Mr. Torgue

EDIT - Did the graphics update include new NPC dialogue? I slagged a psycho last night and heard something about it taking “…a week to wipe this crap off my shottie!” Never heard that before.

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I love the respawn lady. I actually spent a few (hundred) thousand (million, who’s counting?) bucks blowing myself up to hear what she had to say.

  • By using this New-U station, you have forfeited your right to reproduce.
  • Between you and us, that thing that killed you is a total dick. Please disregard this message if you committed suicide.
  • The Hyperion corporation wishes to clarify that the bright light you saw after death was our digistruct technology, and not a higher power. Not higher than Hyperion, anyway.
  • Do not worry about the afterlife, Hyperion customer! Hell is reserved exclusively for pedophiles, and people who buy Jakobs munitions.
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“Oh hey…you’re back.”

“Dying is awesome…all the cool kids are doing it.”

“Aww…again?!?

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"I said, don’t worry about chasing love: if you chase your dreams, then love will follow.
See, that’s the thing with people don’t get - - you watch ECHO films nad they’re just awful.
They teach you that the only way to be with someone is just to pursue them over and over until they decide they like you.
In reality, you know when you like someone almost immediately - - you can’t really convince somebody to fall in love with you.
*You just look like a stalker. *
But if you do things you’re interested in, like making guns that explode or killing mercenaries, then people will see that confidence and skill you have and they’ll be attracted to it."

Grandma Flexington Story

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I’m surprised that no one has brought this one up yet, but it’s yet another quote from the lovable psycho mofo Krieg that he says after being revived sometimes:

Say thank you, NIPPLE SALADS!

Makes me laugh every time I hear it.

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You haven’t played Tales from the Borderlands, have you.

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